MK Ultra is my eject button. I have a lot on my plate right now. Working like 3 jobs plus being a mom. My husband and I are a team and we just found a babysitter. So my brain’s back to processing multiple things at the same time. Working double jobs because we want to save up faster. I try to be mindful and work on a schedule but while I’m on a task, I really can’t help thinking about the other task. And when I’m doing the other task, then I go back to thinking about the other I just put aside. If only I can multitask at the level of working at two different things at the same time. And it makes me anxious. I want to get things down as in right now. All of them in a single snap. Or I wish I have two bodies working at the same time. So at the end of the day I’m very tired. I’d want to watch a movie or series just to unwind. It’s me-time. But I don’t have energy for it and I’m thinking I should go to bed already so I’d wake up early the next day. Then I wake feeling tired and my body achy. So MK Ultra is the eject button. I smoke it or eat it because we put it on brownies too. Whatever I feel like doing. My body relaxes instantly. It’s a pause button. My brain is thinking but it has no desire to do anything. Just think. And I feel like everything’s okay. Everyyyyyythinnnnggg can wait. I have control over my schedule, at least it’s flexible. So I smoke on demand. It’s like when there’s an allergic reaction and I need to take antihistamine. So I have an allergic reaction to over-thinking and MK Ultra is my antihistamine. And all is good. I sometimes just sit in front of my laptop and stare. And it still feels good to not be anxious about wanting to get things done faster so I can get more things done after. And my brain just daydreams. Not the panicky kind of way like making a mental list of what to do next. Relaxation is perfect then I’m off to a good sleep so I’d be well rested and have a less achy body if not totally zero. That’s MK Ultra for me.
MK Ultra is my eject button. I have a lot on my plate right now. Working like 3 jobs plus being a mom. My husband and I are a team and we just found a babysitter. So my brain’s back to processing multiple things at the same time. Working double jobs because we want to save up faster.